No Regrets!

Where do I even begin?

Thoughts keep racing through my mind.

Why do things like this happen?

It's not fair!

How in the world does his parents move on from here?

Will they ever completely heal?

What were the last words he shared with his family?

What will his friends think, will they understand?

His poor sister, they were so close.

What if this happened to one of my boys?


Today?

Tomorrow?

Next week?

I couldn't handle it!

Would I have peace?

Would I have regrets?

I wish I could make all these thoughts disappear, but they keep racing through my mind.


Chris came home early from school yesterday, and I could tell something wasn't right when he began telling me a story about a student of his.

Michael Girard started vomiting in class today. He went to the restroom where he passed out. When he got to the hospital they discovered he has leukemia.

WHAT? Coach Girard's son?

Yes, I just can't believe it! He was running around playing and now he is in the hospital not expected to make it.
It just doesn't make sense.

How is coach taking it?

How do you take that kind of news? 
Just this morning I saw him walking his son across the street to go to school and he had no idea that it would be the last time.


At that point in the conversation, I lost it. I can't even begin to imagine. Once you become a mom and hear such a tragic story, you can feel the pain as if it happened to your child.....I guess it's a mommy emotion that takes over.

Michael began bleeding in his brain and there was nothing the doctors could do, so God wrapped him in his arms and took him home today.
There were prayers going up all over town for the healing of Michael and even though it wasn't the outcome we were hoping for, we know God answered our prayers. We don't always understand since God's ways are not our ways but he always knows the THE BEST WAY.
Michael did receive the ultimate healing, he has a brand new body in Christ. I pray that his family draws near to God at what has to be the hardest trial they have ever been through in their entire life.

I don't know why it takes such a horrible tragedy to make us appreciate the things we should never take for granted. Of course, I immediately begin to reflect on my life with my children. Just picturing today being my last day with one of my boys is too much to bare. If I lost one of them unexpectedly, I would hope that my thoughts were overflowing with the amazing memories of the last few hours I spent with them. I hope it would look something like......

Give me a kiss please

I love you to the moon and back

lets paint

yes, I will read another book

do you want to help me cook

I love how sweet you are to your brother

You have obeyed mommy so well today

Yes, you can have a piece of candy

Of course you can, one movie won't hurt

laughing, laughing, and more laughing

Let's play a game

Mommy,  lets build a train track

Your the best


This is a day in my life most of the time but sometimes the aggravations of raising a three year old can cause me to have a negative attitude. After thinking about Michael playing one minute and being on life support the next, I was so angry at myself. How dare I take my children for granted and waste one minute of getting frustrated over something that won't mean a hill of beans one day.

Who cares.....

If he splashes water all over the floor during bath time

Whines when he doesn't get his way

doesn't share his trains

gets out of the bed 100 times before he actually goes to sleep


We usually get upset and correct Colby for getting out of the bed so many times, but last night I was beyond thankful that he peaked around the corner, tip-toed in our room, and said, "mommy I need one more tiss (kiss), then it time to go to bed."

I kissed him and he walked back to his room, curled in the bed,  and was rolling over to go to sleep, but I took him in my arms carried him back to our bed, and held him close to my heart!

No regrets starting now!