Splish, Splash, & SPANKINGS!

My squirts giggled and splashed all about to beat the heat, and then we made our way to hide beneath the shade tree and enjoy a little picnic.

In the midst of our pleasant picnic, a mother bounded out of her car, jerked her child out of the door, hit him several times on the backside, and proceeded to shout, "move your hands now or you are going to really get it." The scary scene concluded with the mom literally stomping into the splash pad and the little boy following behind with his arms crossed and head hanging low.

The boys were intently starring so I knew I had to do damage control quick, and use it as a teaching tool.

Colby what did you think about that?

That mommy threw a tantrum!

Yes, I think she was very angry about something, do you think so?

YES!

How do you think the little boy felt?

Very sad.

Why do you think he felt sad?

It's not okay to ever hurt someones body, hitting hurts.

Why isn't it okay?

 Hands are not for hitting, they are for hugging and helping people! His body belongs to God!

You are exactly right! What would have been a better choice for her to deal with her anger?

She could have breathed in and out and talked about it.

That's a great idea!
Talking it out is always a good way to find a solution, hitting is never the answer. I bet she didn't mean to treat her son with disrespect, she just lost her temper.

Yeah...maybe she will say sorry later.

I hope so! We could add them to our prayer pail!

Sure!



I use to get upset when my children would see parents hit their children or treat them in a disrespectful manner, but I realized that I can't shelter them from the world, as Bertrand Russell says, it's just the reality of human race.

“I found one day in school a boy of medium size ill-treating a smaller boy. I expostulated, but he replied: ‘The bigs hit me, so I hit the babies; that’s fair.’ In these words he epitomized the history of the human race.”
Bertrand Russell

I can't control what behaviors my children witness, but I can use it as a teaching tool, and find a way to turn it into something good. It's just one more way to draw me closer to God, seek his wisdom, and prepare my children to be men after God's own heart, not live the way of the world.

The conversation took all of two minutes and they were over it as they were shouting, "all done, let's get back in!"

We splashed, laughed, and made a mess.........

Just as our energy was running low and we were about to hit the road, our little friend was tired and started having some big emotions, but this incident played out quite differently. Her mommy remained calm, connected first and then redirected. Mommy acknowledged her feelings, treated her with respect, and showed her compassion....it didn't take long to figure out what baby girl needed!

It was much sweeter to witness

                                                                        connection

self-control

respect

compassion

&

empathy!

“This style of parenting drives us to our knees and so brings us closer to heaven. It forces us to die to self again and again to meet the needs of God’s little creatures. It’s immediately easier to shout and/or hit and abuse our authority to put out the fires of our day. We can stop the behavior through fear and punishment. But that doesn’t really require any heroic, saintly effort on our part, does it? Ultimately, it destroys the relationship with the child and it becomes for us the occasion of sin.”
Elizabeth Foss